DocNeon's settlements

Greetings! I bring a message from the fantabulous settlement of Pillockville! We pillocks that occupy this town are not necessarily stupid, but have performed some questionable acts, mainly against goblinkind. I shall sing you the ballad of our little village…

As our small band of adventurers reached the destination of choice for settlement, we noticed something quite peculiar… An idol! Surely this must be worshiped!

This idol did not seem sizable enough to worship properly. So we built a bigger one! Surely the gods are impressed by such a feat of masonry!

There was a large body of water nearby, so we decided to make use of it by building a moat around Pillockville, oh what a marvelous idea!

The moat wasn’t grand enough, so we made a two story waterborne cafe to crown it. (not taller than the idol, of course)

As the grand moat begins to fill, everything in the world seems to be moving in slow motion! Isn’t that quite odd.

The small rodent befriended by the trapper seems to be eternally hungry. May we pray that he finds the acorn some day…

We appear to have a problem on our hands involving the local denizens.

Our pillock-goblin ambassadors create diplomatic relations as the rest of us dig a trench around the camp. The green ones aren’t going anywhere. We plan to stage an attack in the next few days.

The attack was a failure, some goblins got into the village, and it was a mess. I dare not read the gripe journal.

Despite our best efforts, both of our footmen have died before defeating the goblins. They died while truly honoring the Pillock name. Let their souls rest in peace

That’s all for now! Let me know what you think, I’ll also take suggestions on things to do in the village, buildings, etc.

EDIT: spelling


I really love the waterborne cafe! Very funny.


Continuing progress on the moat…


I would love you forever if you had a save of the blueprint…


I’d like to second @SirAstrix here. It’d also be grand if you saved the waterborne cafe template too!

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@thelegorebel @SirAstrix here are the template download links (via google drive):
Waterborne cafe (fits 5 blocks into the ground): waterborne cafe.json - Google Drive
Giant bunny statue: giant bunny statue large.json - Google Drive
I used instant build, in the fear that having my hearthlings build them might break the game.


Finished the moat!


Awesome! Thanks for the templates! I’ll try regular building them, and see what happens.

Edit: Wow. It takes a long time. I’ll have to continue tomorrow.

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Unfortunately, my village of Pillockville began to break, so I have decided to start a new village - with mods! Using the Bastioneer mod by @Wharp.

A lovely new race that looks like little alien-gnomes, they are quite difficult to manage, and aren’t very durable.

Since they rely heavily on stone, I’ve planned an underground base for them to mine out, eventually completely moving into the 'Neer-made cave.

Made some stone beds (added with the mod) and moved them into the cave. They look so cozy… or maybe not.

Day 4, a worker and a trapper died while fighting a Varanus. RIP.

Indoor berry farm! (forgot to turn off town alert mode, oops)

Rock monsters! These little guys are brutal, and killed my mason. Oh the irony… his work was the end of him.

Whelp, the rock monsters killed literally everyone and now occupy the cave, so yeah. GG, 6-day settlement, GG.

Well that didn’t last very long. I’d love for any new ideas for settlements, so if you want to, reply to the thread, it’s appreciated. Hopefully the next settement will last longer than this one


I love that you chose the difficult choice, the Bastioneers will eventually toughen up, I promise. Too bad about your tribe, maybe net time try to group the neers up for a fight (I know the encounters are quite difficult).

P.S. Id love to put your pictures on the main post if you don’t mind.

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Sure thing! Excited to see what these guys become in the future.

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Heyo, me again. I created a little story detailing my attempt to build the mighty rabbit statue. Hope you enjoy, I’ve linked this original post in there at the top.


Hmmmm wonder if the big bunny statue could become a normal blueprint ingame

Mhm, that would be cool, and I would be honored, but I doubt it’ll happen.

Hey there @KoV, welcome to the Discourse!