a golden orb, that they called apple of eden, and where told to keep it safe from the Templars.
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However, one of Newf’s minions (a dog) made off with the apple and cast it into the fires of Mount Doom from where it was once forged to avenge his brothers and sisters who were once slain by huntsmen…
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but what the dog did not know was that Asdfjki followed him up to Mount Doom to take back what was rightfully theirs. Then seeing that the apple of eden was already destroyed he…
went home and took a long nap, before he encountered many rogue newts who…
were burning down the local Chinese restaurant using…
fire sticks light by Mount Doom itself. Without a second thought, Asdfjki…
(We’ve gotta change his name XD
rushed out the door, to help the poor burning Chinese people who had been dining in the restaurant, however he forgot to put his pants on.
and all of the Chinese people who had been dining in the restaurant passed out because of seeing Asdfjki without pants
Unable to escape from the fire due to having passed out the Chinese people were about to die when Asdfjki…
Used his dog whistle to call for help and a pack of dogs came to rescue. Then Asdfjki passed out and woke up…
…with a pack of dogs putting his pants back onto his legs…
and then he noticed their almighty leader Newf standing in the shadows.
Unfortunately, Newt was heavily…
overweight/drunken…
Which means that he had amazing skills at drinkings and drinking songs at the local tavern which was constructed by…
…the Chinese patrons of the restaurant. Knowing of Newf’s past exploits, they were prepared and…
…ready for anything. But Newt did something that was never expected. He…
meowed at them. This was the one thing they didn’t expect him to do and they…
Ate his potato as a punishement, then…
ran crying into the night, warm hot tears that ran down their faces and made running in the dark very difficult.